Damon Jimmy Horn

If you’re the type of one who simply needs to see the checklist with out studying the entire article, click on right here for the spreadsheet with full rankings. You’re welcome

Across the starting of quarantine I made a decision to tackle the duty of rating each track in Glee. How? I watched by way of the entire sequence and ranked every track on six attributes as they got here up. Why? I’ll let you realize after I discover out.

What’s a track?

Something sung by a forged member, on display screen, when the unique vocals aren’t taking part in. Sing-alongs don’t depend. Tune must final round 15 seconds to be thought of, although there are exceptions. All songs based mostly on the model performed within the episode, not the itunes model.

I used 5 totally different classes on a 10 level scale, with one modifier to create a base rating which might decide the rankings. I’ve given examples of songs for every class that I take into account the most effective and worst of every class.

Vocal high quality

Is the singing good? Are the voices typically nice to take heed to? Does it showcase the vocalist’s finest expertise? Do they hit all of the notes (which appears primary however comes up greater than you might suppose)? On this class, songs don’t get credit score if they’re unhealthy on goal, that is pure vocal high quality.

Context in Episode

Does it make sense for the characters to be singing now? Does it transfer the story ahead? Is that story any good? Does it inform us one thing new a couple of character? Does the track “meet the second” of an episode? (e.g. if a second has been overrated for a season like regionals is, the songs for it higher be good) A track might rating very low on this metric if the track choice is unhealthy, the track doesn’t meet the second, or it doesn’t appear to matter or make sense to place a track there.

Comparability to Authentic

Is the track higher than the unique? Can I take heed to it with out considering “I want I used to be listening to the unique proper now”? Does it one way or the other make the unique worse? Is it an modern cowl, or only a copy of an already in style track? If it’s an unique track, is it good? A track might obtain a foul rating on this metric if I can now not take heed to the unique with out considering of the heinous glee cowl.

Efficiency

Is there loads of emotion within the track? Any dancing or theatricality? If the track is meant to be humorous, is it humorous? How is the tone of the efficiency? A track doesn’t should be excessive to have a excessive efficiency rating, typically having one particular person at a piano is the most effective efficiency determination obtainable. That is the place a track will get credit score whether it is unhealthy, but it surely’s unhealthy on goal.

Association

Do the devices sound good? If there are modifications from the unique, do they make sense and improve the track? Is there an excessive amount of autotune? Good mashups are inclined to do properly right here, whereas unhealthy mashups might be horrible.

Schuester rap

I reserve the appropriate to subtract one or two factors at will if Mr. Schuester makes an attempt to rap, or one other character makes an attempt to rap in a fashion much like Mr. Schuester (e.g. badly).

These classes are very interconnected. If the vocal high quality is unhealthy, the efficiency suffers. Context in episode performs a job in every thing. Earlier than we get into the rankings, right here’s some knowledge about the most effective and worst episodes.

Finest Musical Episode (Common rating 38.3)

“The Quarterback” (S5E3)

Glee’s tribute to the late Cory Monteith stays not solely solely top-of-the-line episodes of Glee ever, however an all time nice tv episode. Each track is gutting. Lea Michele’s tour de pressure efficiency of “Make You Really feel My Love” nonetheless makes me cry. Santana’s “If I Die Younger” takes a totally common pop hit and turns it into a ravishing second.

Worst Musical Episode (Common rating 22.5)

“The Spanish Instructor” (S3E12)

That is the place we see a few of the worst of Will Schuester, the place he admits that he really doesn’t know Spanish, regardless of being a SPANISH TEACHER. It’s really an alright episode (if you happen to learn the Schuester plot as being self-aware), however the music is VERY lackluster and contains some weak factors. Ricky Martin is a stable, proficient visitor star they usually have him sing… “Horny and I do know It”. Schuester treats us to a partly offensive efficiency of “La Cucaracha” and a Spanish model of “A Little Much less Dialog” the place many of the Spanish is incorrect. The saving grace of this episode is the duet “La Isla Bonita”, between Ricky Martin and Santana.

  1. Teenage Dream (Reprise)

That is amongst Glee’s most brutal performances. Blaine is visiting his longtime beau, Kurt, in New York after dishonest on him. They go to a type of present tunes karaoke bar and Blaine sings his coronary heart out. Darren Criss alone at a piano was all the time one of many present’s finest weapons, and he doesn’t disappoint. The truth that it is a pretty subpar Katy Perry track makes it even higher. The second pause earlier than the refrain the place Blaine collects himself is so actual. They resist the urge to autotune every thing, and let Criss be the right quantity of messy for the scene. That is the second that one of many present’s most enduring relationships falls aside, all compressed into 5 minutes.

In the whole sequence of Glee, there are possibly 15 whole minutes of realism. The braveness to decide to this second of extremely sincere ache in an acoustic cowl of Katy Perry completely displays how Glee may create an absurd world with very actual feelings in it.

I’m not saying everybody who likes this track is homosexual, however that is each homosexual particular person’s favourite Glee track.

2. Make You Really feel My Love

The Quarterback isn’t simply top-of-the-line episodes of glee, it’s top-of-the-line episodes of tv from the last decade. Your entire episode, you realize Rachel goes to sing finally, however you’re not prepared for it. You’re by no means prepared for it.

Rachel Berry is singing about her lately handed away on and off boyfriend, Finn Hudson. Lea Michele, the actress that performed Rachel, additionally dated Cory Monteith (Finn) in actual life.

Her monologue earlier than is ideal. Everyone seems to be simply barely conserving it collectively. You’ll be able to’t actually take into account the Quarterback exterior the context of Monteith’s dying. It’s tv, it’s Glee and additionally it is a wake. It’s one thing a lot extra uncooked than something the present has carried out.

I believed a very long time about whether or not this or Teenage Dream can be the highest track. I in the end determined that that is, musically, the higher track. But it surely feels thus far exterior of the Glee universe, it expresses a message that Glee by no means tried to the touch once more. So that is the higher track, however Teenage Dream is the higher GLEE track.

3. I Wanna Maintain Your Hand

Whereas Colfer was by no means the strongest singer in Glee, he was all the time top-of-the-line actors and characters. Singing about his father who had a latest stroke, Colfer croons the Beatles within the type of TV Carpio in “Throughout the Universe” (additionally an incredible efficiency). The present took its time to develop the connection between Kurt and his father, and it reveals right here. His efficiency is gutting, and the cutscenes are transferring with out being too sappy. The small contact of younger Kurt carrying a dapper bowtie whereas studying to trip a motorbike is sort of an excessive amount of to deal with. The track is so good, it makes you neglect that Glee spent the entire episode fumbling some type of message about faith that’s by no means fairly clear.

4. Don’t Rain on My Parade

Within the opening quantity on the first actual competitors the New Instructions go to, Rachel Berry kills it. Coming from the again and strolling by way of the aisle is such a highschool present choir energy transfer. Each side of the efficiency is so enjoyable.

The second the place Rachel says “I march my band out” and the remainder of the membership comes out is likely one of the finest musical moments the present has. That is principally simply Rachel being Barbara Streisand, however that could be very very exhausting to beat.

5. Disco Inferno

This track is nice, Mercedes is nice, the efficiency is nice. I do know that is cheesier than some individuals might like, and I invite these individuals to make their very own rating of 705 Glee songs.

However I wish to discuss a line on the finish of the scene that could be the worst line ever aired on tv. Mr. Shuester has been getting on Mercedes about her after commencement plans. After KILLING her efficiency, Mercedes says:

“Opposite to present opinion, I do have a dream. My dream is Mariah, it’s Whitney, it’s Aretha”

To which Mr. Shu replies

“These are individuals, they’re not goals”

We will throw out the chance that Will isn’t conscious of the existence of Mariah Carey, Whitney Houston and Aretha Franklin, as a result of the glee membership has carried out songs by all of them. That is actually a baffling line.

Nice track although.

6. Don’t Cease Believing

Don’t Cease Believing was the primary nice track Glee did. They beat it to dying in commercials, but it surely was all the time catchy and precipitated a small resurgence of the unique Journey track. It was the right track for the scrappy, underdog glee membership to do. It’s unreasonably honest for a track in a present the place a trainer simply planted medicine in a college students’ locker, however that’s what makes Glee nice. If the primary season has a thesis, it’s “being part of one thing particular makes you particular”. This track makes you’re feeling particular listening to it and actually drives residence that sappy (however good) message.

This track was so good they did it a complete of 4 instances within the present. My rating of all of the”Don’t Cease Believing” performances are as following

Finest: Pilot

Alright: The one which’s a reunion for Will’s unborn child

Fairly unhealthy: The one from Regionals

Even worse: The one the place Rachel auditions for Humorous woman

7. Child It’s Chilly Outdoors

The chemistry between Blaine and Kurt is phenomenal, as are each of their voices. You fall in love with them and also you fall in love with the truth that they’re falling in love with one another. That is additionally the least creepy model of “Child It’s Chilly Outdoors” to take heed to, which is cool.

8. Teenage Dream

That is the primary track we hear from the Warblers, the acapella group from homosexual utopia faculty, Dalton Academy. It’s carried out proper after Kurt and Blaine meet, and it’s such a enjoyable, catchy track. After I was in highschool, I had a CD (the one with all of the Warbler’s songs) and I performed this one a lot the CD began to skip. They enhance principally each side of the track.

9. Rumor Has It/Somebody Like You

Finest mash-up Glee ever did. The pause after the primary Four strains is BEAUTIFUL. Santana’s pained refrain is heartbreaking and indignant. This mashup highlights a few of the finest components of each songs, and is likely one of the treasured few duets between Mercedes and Santana. I nonetheless consider how good this model is after I hear the originals.

This additionally set the stage for Finn to sing “Ladies Simply Wanna Have Enjoyable” to Santana, which is one other high 20.

10. Rolling In The Deep

Rachel falls for Jesse St. James (A+ character identify) whereas belting a duet. Utterly unrealistic and wonderful. The stripped down association works properly with two nice voices. Jonathon Groff can sing angrily at me whereas carrying a tiny scarf any day.

11. Valerie

Santana singing Amy Winehouse is like Yo Yo Ma taking part in a cello. It simply works. The swankiness of the voice, the sudden solo from a routinely underestimated member of the forged, the wonderful dancing.

We don’t get loads of dance solos together with Britney and Mike Chang, however that’s solely because of the teaching failures of Will Schuester. They elevate each quantity they’re in, and may’ve been in each competitors quantity at the least as soon as.

12. Not Whereas I’m Round

The emotion in Blaine’s voice will get me each time. One of many few instances within the sequence {that a} second feels actually intimate, not prefer it’s behind 5 layers of efficiency. It’s quick however good.

I believe the second strongest second a performer may give is that if it appears like they’re speaking on to you. Probably the most highly effective second is if you happen to understand they aren’t speaking to you in any respect. They aren’t frightened in regards to the stage or the viewers. Blaine is technically singing for his NYADA project, but it surely nonetheless appears like he’s on the hospital mattress. He’s nonetheless singing to Kurt.

13. Songbird

The connection between Santana and Britney was all the time a fan favourite, for good cause. We don’t see Santana get emotionally weak usually, so it’s particular when she does. One of many few “points” Glee understood was popping out of the closet. I believe this track did loads of good for lots of people, and it nonetheless stands up at the moment.

14. The First Time Ever I Noticed Your Face

Simply watch the video. I’m a sap. I like these things.

15. Completely satisfied Days Are Right here Once more/Get Completely satisfied

One of many higher mash up concepts that Glee executed. Good finish to a very good episode, and the crescendo of the track is nice. Kurt is at residence with a Broadway commonplace. His outfit is suitably ridiculous. It’s exhausting to take heed to this with out wanting to affix in throughout the previous couple of “blissful days are right here once more”.

16. If I Die Younger

Santana offers a masterclass efficiency within the Quarterback. She takes what is generally a saccharine pop ballad and imbues it with a way of goal. Her breaking down and working away is likely one of the few instances Glee has really stunned me. It’s uncooked, troublesome to take heed to, and excellent.

17. I Nonetheless Haven’t Discovered What I’m Wanting For

Usually, the New Instructions’ performances look completely nothing like a highschool present choir would. Season 5’s efficiency options the New Instructions performing the favourite songs of their late coach, Finn Hudson. Not like different competitions, everybody sings a good quantity and also you see the workforce contributing to the trouble in small and massive methods. The expansion moments throughout the season even have payoff! That is so significantly better than hiring a bunch of 27 year-olds to do backflips and fake to be high-schoolers.

Glee disrespected Sam Evans a lot. He took care of his household after his dad misplaced his job and nonetheless got here again for a present choir! They deal with him like a golden retriever, even supposing he works exhausting and all the time saves the glee membership. He proved that the Warblers had been taking steroids (it’s an extended story) so as to get them disqualified and provides the New Instructions an unearned spot at regionals. This is likely one of the few songs the place Sam will get the hero therapy and I adore it.

18. Easy Prison

One of many solely 10 scores for association, it is a tremendous enjoyable cowl. The musical battle is ridiculous. That Warbler assaulted Blaine. He must be in jail.

What is that this room arrange for? There are round 50 chairs in concentric circles surrounding two cellos. There have been by no means that many individuals within the room.

19. Sing

Mike Chang is eminently likeable. He exudes likeability. He’s unimaginable to not like. In certainly one of his most charming performances, he dances his coronary heart out to A Refrain Line’s Sing. This track is entertaining and shines a lightweight on top-of-the-line, underappreciated stars of Glee.

20. Ladies Simply Wanna Have Enjoyable

I by no means anticipated to love this in any respect. A stripped down model of Ladies Simply Wanna Have Enjoyable feels like one thing that may be attention-grabbing, however not fairly good. However Cory Monteith nails it. He was all the time so significantly better at tone than musicality; it reveals right here.

21. I Dreamed a Dream

Idina Mendzel was all the time such an incredible match as Rachel’s mother, regardless of their very unusual “Poker Face” cowl. Lea Michele and Idina Mendzel going toe to toe is a recipe for achievement. You don’t must do rather more than give them a microphone and hit file.

22. And I Am Telling You, I’m Not Going

I can’t consider they had been capable of wait 12 entire episodes earlier than having Mercedes sing this track. That is already a bona fide high 50 finest track of all time and Amber Riley does the unique justice. She kills it. It’s the right diva track.

23. Mine

Santana is such a star. You understand midway by way of what the track is about and it’s a intestine punch. She solely wants her voice and guitar to fill a room. Why isn’t the present about Santana?

24. Being Good Isn’t Good Sufficient

Rachel Berry’s New York saga was a low level for Glee, however we at the least acquired some nice performances. Lea Michele’s singing makes you neglect that they solely informed you in regards to the winter showcase this episode.

25. If I Had been A Boy

Distinctive was such a promising character that acquired left by the wayside. Glee all the time brushed trans points, however wasn’t eager about making it a focus till season 6. This was a shiny second, and it packs an emotional punch.

26. Le Jazz Scorching

Kurt doing a duet with himself is essentially the most deliciously diva factor Glee has carried out. He completely kills it and provides top-of-the-line performances glee has ever seen.

27. Pinball Wizard

Whereas watching this, I used to be rooting for vocal Adrenaline as a result of Distinctive is so good! They handle to be theatrical whereas being rooted in nice efficiency. Whereas that is an accentuated present choir efficiency, it is also rather more within the attain of excessive schoolers than different performances.

28. Bridge Over Troubled Water

That is classic Mercedes and excellent. Bridge Over Troubled Water works nice as gospel, however it is a model I hadn’t heard earlier than. Mercedes’ voice is nice as all the time.

29. Candy Transvestite

Having Mercedes as Dr. Frankenfurter is a stroke of genius. It’s exhausting to do one thing distinctive with one thing that’s been lined as a lot as Rocky Horror, however they nail it. The efficiency from all of the backups is stable as properly.

30. River Deep Mountain Excessive

The duets episode is nice, however Mercedes and Santana had been robbed. The one factor that holds this track again is that it was only for a category project and by no means was utilized in a extra excessive stakes storyline (but it surely ought to have been!) Nonetheless recurrently makes an look on my playlists.

683. Dinosaur

This track might need a declare of being purposefully unhealthy however I don’t see it. The unique is unhealthy, this cowl can also be unhealthy, the choice to do additionally it is unhealthy.

684. Singing Within the Rain/Umbrella

Worst mash up in Glee historical past. Singing within the rain doesn’t work in any respect, irrespective of how a lot manufacturing they throw at it. The stage is cool, however that’s about the one good factor. I really feel like I’m driving in a automobile the place the radio is damaged and the station retains switching.

685. Creep

Listening to Creep is meant to really feel like getting punched within the abdomen. In actual fact, the one method to strip the emotion out of the track is to attempt too exhausting. Creep will not be alleged to be simple to take heed to. It ought to by no means be nice. They picked two of the worst potential characters to do that track.

686. Identical Love

That is possibly the preachiest Glee has gone, and Will nonetheless can’t rap. It’s type of exhausting to smash a track that’s already half a joke in 2020, however Glee did it. This may properly be the worst track, however Distinctive is sweet and Will mercifully doesn’t do the final verse.

687. Hey Ya

Artie’s vocals sound unusual and over-produced right here and the vibe is rather more karaoke than something good. This track is harm rather a lot by the truth that Hey Ya! Is among the finest songs of the previous 20 years they usually do a barely beneath common job at it. There are lots of good Hey Ya covers. This isn’t certainly one of them.

688. Imply

I actually by no means wanted a pop punk cowl of Taylor Swift from the 2 characters of Glee which can be least prone to take heed to Taylor Swift. Possibly it connects thematically to the plot? Nope. Probably not.

689. Blurred Strains

Will fails in his try to make a track about date rape empowering. His twerking campaign is among the many worst issues Glee has carried out. Kitty actually says meow. Whereas no second is especially terrible to take heed to, the entire thought is terrible in sum.

690. La Cucaracha

William Schuester is a fraud and shouldn’t be a trainer. I assure you Santana was not the primary particular person to level out the problem of taking part in La Cucaracha in a highschool classroom in full mariachi gear, notably when your trainer doesn’t know Spanish.

691. You’ve Received to Struggle for Your Proper to Occasion

The unique is a lot extra charming and enjoyable. Glee’s portrayal of school was all the time unhealthy. This can be a soulless, overproduced model of a Beastie Boys basic. Although it’s paradoxically, not an excellent social gathering track.

692. Stereo Hearts

One other track with horrible rapping however a few redeeming qualities. The story line is bland, the track is tremendous pop-trash and Sam is fairly unhealthy. Additional factors for becoming the phrase “Trouty” within the verse although.

693. Gold Digger

This begins the lengthy historical past of Will Schuester utilizing rehearsal time to point out off his subpar expertise as an alternative of doing something helpful. Mercedes is nice, however the association is VERY Kidz Bop. After they mentioned “No we ‘aint seen her!” I wanted to cease to take a break and catch my breath. Nonetheless, there are moments the place the non-Will components come collectively, saving this from a backside 10 ranking.

694. One Love/Folks Get Prepared

Glee doing Bob Marley feels like a setup for a punchline greater than an affordable inventive determination. Additionally they’re busking at a highschool. They’re REALLY fortunate to decide on this track because the metal drum membership was training. It appears like they’re colonizing the track, they usually aren’t even doing a very good job at that.

695. Push It

That is difficult, as a result of this track is unquestionably unhealthy on goal. But it surely additionally isn’t THAT humorous. It goes on for too lengthy. Artie’s interlude is completely terrible. The concept that is… attractive? Looks as if a stretch. Finn’s rapping is one other notably tough spot.

696. Everyone Talks

This can be a bizarre one. Simply take heed to it, the tone is horrible, it’s virtually like they’re lacking notes WITH AUTOTUNE. This isn’t Jake or Kitty’s fault, there are simply round Three or Four moments the place the track sounds horrible. These seem to be fixable issues. Do one other take.

697. The Thong Tune

Will’s snicker initially of this track must be punished by life imprisonment. This entire factor could be very awkward. There’s no cause the track ought to cease or why they may’ve fallen, but it surely mercifully cuts the track quick.

698. A Little Much less Dialog

The revelation that Will Schuester didn’t really know Spanish is completely horrible. His Spanish on this track is horrible, and any track that’s JUST Will making college students uncomfortable is fairly unhappy. They type of acknowledge that what Will did was unhealthy, however he ought to’ve been fired.

699. American Boy

This is likely one of the most baffling track alternatives in Glee historical past. Blaine is making an attempt to win the help of a rich benefactor who likes Blaine, however not Kurt. Blaine decides he loves Kurt greater than something and refuses to carry out with out him, they usually get able to do a duet.

Then they do the R&B/Hip-Hop duet of American Boy by Estelle and Kanye West. Blaine can’t rap. The track is type of in Kurt’s vary, however not comfortably. This had potential to be a extremely cool second, and as an alternative Blaine and Kurt destroy a wonderfully good track. Nobody requested how a homosexual teen lounge singer would cowl this track, however now we all know.

700. Gangnam Model

For some cause they informed the viewers that the New Instructions can be performing Gangnam Model at competitors a pair episodes earlier than, so I used to be dreading it. It nonetheless was worse than I believed it might be. Tina is purposefully annoying, the dancing is unhealthy and dumb, and THIS IS THE NUMBER THEY HAD MARLEY FAINT AFTER. THERE IS A TONE PROBLEM!

701. The Chipmunk Tune

The vocals are purposefully annoying and the plot to this episode made no sense. The attention sweet can’t save this. There’s not a ton to say. It’s simply very unhealthy and really dumb and by no means ought to have occurred.

702. Black or White

After the Warblers bodily assault and almost blind Blaine, the New Instructions have them over for a pleasant kumbaya second the place all of them sing Michael Jackson. It’s a really Kidz Bop association at a time that made NO SENSE. Artie’s rap is unhealthy, notably as a result of he’s speaking about race relations with a fairly clear and unhealthy blaccent. They do a cheeky impersonation of the music video to finish the track, which is ok. They win the Warblers (who beforehand assaulted their teammate) over.

703. Fly/I Imagine I Can Fly

Half of this track is unbearable rapping and overproduced vocals, and the opposite half is by R Kelly so it feels a LOT much less inspiring than it was. The faux crowd cheering after Blaine’s verse is unbearable. You additionally don’t get to mock Nicki Minaj with Sue’s horrible efficiency, then do a track by her about how she’s handled unfairly.

704. What Does the Fox Say?

Nothing about this is sensible. The puppets make no sense. The noises are deeply discomforting, as is the auto-tune. The jungle is unnecessary. They don’t appear to know if they’re making a joke or overlaying the track straight up, in order that they do each. The unique track is at the least a bit of foolish and distinctive. That is unhappy. I initially had this ranked a bit greater however upon re-listening moved it decrease. That is probably the one Glee track I’ll by no means take heed to once more.

705. “I Nonetheless Imagine/Superbass”

In the beginning of this scene, we see Ryder, who’s being catfished by a fellow member of the glee membership, a incontrovertible fact that involves mild throughout a college capturing in two episodes. This has nothing to do with the scene but it surely’s price a reminder.

Blaine and Sue are arguing about… one thing and resolve to have a diva-off to resolve who wins for… causes. Blaine is emulating Mariah Carey and does a wonderfully succesful efficiency of “I Nonetheless Imagine”. Nevertheless, his dead-in-the-soul eyes counsel he might have some thought of what’s about to occur.

Sue has been channeling Nicki Minaj, persistently mocking the triple platinum artist. She then proceeds to do one of many worst covers I’ve ever seen, open mics included. The entire thing is excessive and… possibly unhealthy on goal? However It’s exhausting to inform.

They alter the road “He may promote dope” to “He may be broke”, which is principally the alternative of the unique level of the road and likewise very lame. Blaine tries to come back in with a pitiful mash up try, however that is the Sue present now.

The glee membership claps as if that is the most effective factor they’ve ever seen.



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